I met up with my director last night to discuss a) why our film wasn’t being accepted at any festivals b) our next couple of projects and c) the relative merits of Fosters, Stella and fish and chips.

Consequently I got the late train home. To get to my house from the station I have to walk through some fields, currently filled with acres of waist high grass. Half way home, I noticed some rustling in the grass. Something was moving and it was too big to be a field mouse or a rabbit. I heard it dart quickly ahead of me and then suddenly, in the undergrowth on the other side of the path, there was more rustling. Behind me, something heavy dashed across the track, too fast for me to make out what it was. I became aware that they were slowly circling in on me, closing in for the kill.

Okay, so I made that last bit up. I expect they were foxes or, more likely, badgers. It wasn’t like they were velociraptors or anything - remember that scene in Lost World: Jurassic Park where the ‘raptors stalk the hunting party in the long grass?