It’s not quite October and the local Tesco’s have already put the crackers and decorations up for sale for that time of year. Christmas always divides people - those that hate it and those that love it, those that buy all their pressies before the middle of October and those that are still shopping on Christmas morning, those that can’t stand it being spelt Xmas and those that couldn’t give a toss.

Personally, I’m quite ambivalent about the whole thing. I always find it an anti-climax but quite enjoy the copious amount of food and drink that it’s compulsory to consume in the lead up. But it’s always a headache trying to think of what to get people so this year I am putting together a list of of suggested gifts that I may come in useful.

#1. Boring Postcards
A collection of postcards inspired by the mid century attempt to modernise Britain and feature 160 images of the new civic centres, motorways, airports and power stations that were built during the 50’s and 60’s. Features such classic pictures as Stevenage Town Centre, Brent Cross Shopping Centre, Forte Excelsior Motor Lodge, Stoke Mandeville Hospital Canteen, and much much more. The absence of any redeeming and interesting features in the postcards highlights the difference in attitudes prevalent in Britain then and now. It also raises curious questions about who the hell actually bought postcards like that!

Available at Amazon for £10.47

A couple of weeks ago, Jane was unimpressed at the story behind the impending new Catwoman film with Halle Berry. I can’t imagine that she’s too taken with the image of the new Catwoman costume either. It’s more something you expect to see on the cover of one of those pron vids that are always cashing in on the success of a popular film. I swear to god I hope this is a fake! I’m sure it probably won’t be but I can’t imagine how on earth they’re going to justify this on any level. Picture can be found at Empire Online.

More encouraging film news though: the trailer for Return Of The King has been released and frankly it looks fantastic. If they overlook Peter Jackson and this film at the Oscars next year, it will be a travesty. Except in the unlikely event of the film being crap of course. Link to a downloadable version of the 480X360 version here. (Right click and “Save As…”) It is is 27Mb though but worth it.

Also sucking me in is the new trailer for Matrix: Revolutions. As I’ve made it well known elsewhere, I thought Reloaded was the dullest and most tedious load of tosh I’ve seen in a while and it even turned me off seing Revolutions. This trailer has started to persuade me that it might be worth going to see the third movie though. We shall see. Link to Hi Res trailer here.

One of the silver linings to the particular cloud over the lair at the moment is that I can watch films in peace. Owing to my mood, they haven’t been particularly challenging. All three were McDonald’s movies - crap, but fill you up. Here’s a quick rundown…

Bulletproof Monk
The saving graces of this film amount to the following: Chow Yun Fat being very cool and in a virtual self parody of his roles to date. Victoria Smurfit in a tight catsuit. The tongue in cheek humour. It’s very silly and the action is pretty crap but it’s entertaining and doesn’t require much thinking about. Probably would have been fantastic if it had been written by Joss Whedon.

The Recruit
Fairly run of the mill action spy thriller. Al Pacino is, well, Al Pacino and Colin Farrell was okay. I confess I was convinced by his accent and do think he could make it big if he doesn’t get stereotyped. Nothing to write home about, although it did promote some interesting thoughts about patriotism that I may blog about soon.

Frailty
This is the Whopper with cheese of the three movies (as in, much tastier and more substantial than a Big Mac). Bill (Aliens, Near Dark) Paxton’s directing debut is about a serial killer who kills after having visions from God. Matthew McConaughey, Bill Paxton and Powers Boothe star and are, like the film itself, quite competent. The pacing is a bit slow and I feel the voiceover narration detracts from the film’s tension but it’s not a bad film. Quite creepy when you think about the subject matter.

Still haven’t got around to seeing Underworld. Maybe this week, depending on how everything goes.

perfect little dream
the kind that hurts the most
forgot how it feels
well, almost
no one to blame
always the same
open my eyes
wake up in flames

it took you to make me realize
it took you to make me see the light
smashed up my sanity
smashed up my integrity
smashed up what i believed in
smashed up what’s left of me
smashed up my everything
smashed up all that was true
gonna smash myself to pieces
i don’t know what else to do

covered in hope and vaseline
still cannot fix this broken machine
watching the hole it used to be mine
just watching it burn in my steady systematic decline
of the trust i will betray
give it to me - i throw it away

after everything i’ve done
i hate myself for what i’ve become

i tried
i gave up
throw it away

And yes, I am in a good mood today!

It’s nearly October. That means it’s only a month until NaNoWriMo. And I’m very, very tempted to enter.

But what if I haven’t got an idea? What if it’s no good? What if I can’t do 50,000 words?

What the hell - it’s only a tenner! And it’s a good way to kill time on the train!

Some very overdue movie and dvd reviews. In fact, so overdue I’m going to limit myself to a couple of lines on each.

Finding Nemo
Pixar (Toy Story, Monsters Inc - as if I needed to tell you!) stike gold again. Maybe I’m biased because of my diving obsession, but this was great. The excellent animation, wonderful characters and good story all intact and in place. It’s very too and very much humour for the grown ups in some places! Seeing it on a small airplane screen does it no justice though so I shall be seeing it again on the big screen.

The Italian Job
I love the original Michael Caine version. It’s one of my all time faves so you can imagine how horrified I was when I found out they were doing a remake. Except that it’s not. It’s a “re-imagining”. The only similar things are some characters names, a token heist in Italy and, of course, the minis. It’s actually a fun film to watch but isn’t as memorable as the original - no classic quotes, no classic scenes and a far more straightforward story. It confirms my suspicion that Marky Mark has only one type of acting style and that he isn’t really leading man material because his style is “a bit wet really”. Probably worth waiting til it’s on DVD or TV though. Enjoyable trash.

Whale Rider
Another film I’d like to see on the big screen. This is a modern day New Zealand based story about Pai, a young girl who challenges the accepted norms of her community by wanting to become “chief”. This is a visually beautiful film with a superbly written adaptation and some wonderful performances, not least from newcomer Keisha Castle-Hughes. I don’t mind admitting that it moved me and I thoroughly recommend it.

City of God (Cicade de Deus)
Missed this at the cinema so got the DVD. What a mistake. A fantastic film and quite possibly the best of the year so far. Think Brazilian Goodfellas but set in the slums of Rio. It’s a story about young boys growing up in the City of God, an actual place in Rio and one of the most depressingly poor places you’ll come across. Some fantastic performances bring this film to life, especially as some of the young actors actually come from the City of God themselves. Also on the DVD is a documentary about the place itself as it is now, including interviews with Police, inhabitants and criminals. It’s fascinating, if depressing that such a place exists. I can’t recommend this film enough.

Y Tu Mama Tambien
This has been out for some time and I’ve owned it for ages but didn’t get around to watching it for a while. Essentially the story of two teenagers who persuade an older lady to go with them on a trip to beach that doesn’t exist. I liked it a lot. Well written and some good direction (by Alfonso Cuaron who’s directing the next Harry Potter film).

Below
This didn’t get a cinematic release here although it’s better than some of the shit that has. It’s basically a ghost story set on a WW2 submarine. After picking up some survivors of a sinking British hospital ship, strange events begin to happen on board an American submarine. Written and directed by David Twohy who did the marvellous Pitch Black, this is a low budget creepy film which doesn’t quite hit the mark. Adequate performances from the (mostly British) cast, including Olivia Williams, Jason Flemyng and Dexter Fletcher but let down by some cheap SFX and a script (co-written by Darren “Pi” Aronofsky) which doesn’t really fulfill. Passes the time.

Also managed to see Matrix Reloaded on the plane again. It truly is a dreadfully dull film. Such a disappointment. Not even Monica Belluci in rubber or Carrie Ann Moss in pvc is enough to make me want to own this on DVD (And yes, I’m willing to justify this statement and get into any argument about it. Because I’m right!)

“The Phantom of Liberty” is a great film made by the surrealist director Luis Bunuel in 1974. The film is a series of linked episodes which challenge our conception of how free we actually are in our thoughts and actions.

I only bring this up because of an article in the Sunday Times I read last night about how Tony Blair wants to block a public smoking ban because, and I quote:

[he] has told colleagues that any step of this kind would be a severe restriction on people’s freedoms

This is from the same man who’s current Home Secretary is pushing ahead with a national system of ID cards.

Now this isn’t an anti-smoking rant or an opinion on whether smoking should be banned in public places (although I do think it should be banned in places where food is served) and I’m not even sure that I like the idea of it being banned in pubs (being an ex-smoker who only really smoked when he drank).

But I do question our fearless misLeaders motives. I can’t see this being prompted by an interest in people’s freedom but more because of either pressure from the tobacco companies (who may have mentioned in passing something about withdrawing financial support from the government perhaps) or because of the decrease in revenue from the huge amount of tax that’s whacked on top of every pack.

If he was really worried about our freedoms, then surely he wouldn’t have any hesitation in pushing forward total decriminalisation of cannabis or maybe questioning the laws surrounding suicide. Or lowering the age of consent for gays. Not to mention the freedom related issues surrounding ID cards, cameras in supermarkets and the selling of email addresses/mobile phone numbers etc.

BTW - can anyone explain in simple words what the difference is between decriminalise and legalise? I still don’t get it!

Sitting here, looking out of the window, I am reminded of some classic Beatles lyrics.

Sitting in an English Garden
Waiting for the sun
If the sun don’t shine you get a tan
You get a tan from standing in the English rain

Goo goo g’joob indeed!

An Oxford University study has recently shown that the single celled parasite toxoplasma gondii can have a profound affect on the human brain, resulting in a distinct change to a persons personality.

The parasite is usually carried by domestic cats, who get toxoplasma from hunting rats. The parasite is then passed from cat to owner. Although virtually harmless to most humans, pregnant mothers, amongst others, are advised to keep away from cats because of the potential damage that toxoplasmosis can do to unborn babies. However, the implications of this study suggests that cat owners do undergo a psychological change.

Women can become “sex kittens”, more fun-loving, less trustworthy and possibly promiscuous. (Apparently they also spend more on clothes!). Men on the other hand, become “alley cats” - more aggressive, scruffy and anti-social (and, allegedly, less attractive to women!)

I used to own a cat a couple of years ago until I moved. Unfortunately my wife is allergic to them and, faced with the difficult choice of cat vs partner-for-life, I chose to give the cat away to a “good family”. During the 2/3 years I had my cat, I was extremely messy, anti-social, aggressive and scruffy. (Never had much problem with the ladeez though even if I do say so myself! ;-D Partly, I feel, because I showed a “sensitive” side by owning a cat!) So maybe there is something in the study!

But riddle me this, Batman! How do you explain the 20 plus years prior to that when I didn’ keep feline company but was still scruffy, aggressive and anti-social! In fact, I’m still scruffy and anti-social. And I don’t own a cat anymore!

Furthermore, several female cat owners I know certainly could not be described as “sex kittens!” They are prudish, uptight, dull and lacking in dress sense. And that’s just the good points!

You can tell some people who are cat owners because they do fit the descriptions above. But I personally feel that this is their character and it is because of their character that they own cats. I know a few outgoing, flirtatious and fun-loving women who own cats because cats are independent, graceful and slightly wild. They complemented each other perfectly (he types, narrowly avoiding a cheesy tabloid pun in the process!)

Somehow, I don’t think any of the scientists involved in this study owned cats themselves as they would have been more aware of this in the first place. This theory holds as much water as the Kabalarian name analysis thingy whatsit that people have been dissing.

(Read in the Metro but more info here

So there’s a headline on the BBC Ticker which says ‘Binge drinking “costing billions”‘

I know that the price of a G&T in London is quite steep but surely this is a bit of an overstatement!