While deleting spam this morning, I noticed one of the emails had not been picked up by spam filter and been appropriately tagged. This happens from time to time but the curious thing about this email was the subject line which, curiously, was both spelled and punctuated correctly. It simply read

“YOU HAVE BEEN IDENTIFIED AS UN-AMERICAN”

“Well done,” I thought to myself. “Am I bovvered?” I thought secondly.

The email had been sent by “Bureau of Morality - Year 0000 Search”. After checking to make sure my virus scanner was running, I risked opening the email. I’m a sucker for correctly spelled and curiously titled spam emails. Every now and then there are some nuggets although mostly they are the usual men’s aids and share schemes. I wondered what this was trying to sell me.

“ATTENTION!” it proclaimed. “The Bureau of Morality has identified you as A CONSUMER OF DISSIDENT MATERIAL.”

“Cool!” I thought. I read on.

This is a one time warning. Any further attempts to view, consume, or distribute un-american content will result in the loss of citizenship increments and/or the imposition of fines, penalties, or imprisonment.

You have choices. Make the RIGHT ones.

For further information on making good choices, visit http://www.thepriceoftreason.net

——————–

Bureau of Morality
One Nation Under God

I mused on the contents of the email, wondering where it came from. It’s obviously not real. Or is it that obvious? Was it someone I know having a bored moment? If so, it’s very imaginative. It is it the start of Perplexcity series 2? Unlikely seeing as series 1 only just finished. Or is it just very creative spam. Perhaps it’s actually from some fervent right wing Yank, sending me harassing emails. Amber Night perhaps? There are a lot of links listed in the spoof trace pattern at the top. Do I dare click on them? If I’d had my third cup of caffiene flavoured neural-stimulant then perhaps I would have focussed (fuckarsed?) on the url titles but there were too many letters, too many words. There must be a clue in there somewhere.

Google Search: Bureau of Morality.

The fishscales fall from my eyes. Revelation and understanding. I want to believe. I am trying to believe. After all, this is just another version of the truth.

“Cool!” I thought again. “Shame I didn’t spot the clue.“